Helping Young Children Learn to Tie Shoes
January 28, 2015 • January 28, 2015

Last week, I wrote about the importance of encouraging dressing skills in young children. As a follow-up, I thought it might be nice to talk about the helping young children learn to tie shoes. My years as a teacher in the Children's House, or Primary classroom, at Forest Bluff School have taught me how valuable this particular dressing skill is to the young child between three and six years of age.


Forest Bluff is one of very few schools that asks young children to wear “tie shoes” from the age of three. In fact, a local shoe-store owner recently told me that “tie shoes” are actually against the dress code of many of our local schools’ early childhood programs!


Tying (and constantly re-tying) a child’s shoes is certainly a hassle. I can understand why some teachers, assistants, and parents don’t want to deal with it. Teaching young children to tie their own shoes isn’t easy either, particularly when they haven’t had the preparation provided by a supportive Montessori classroom and home environment.



So what’s wrong with taking the easy way out? Just because a child can learn to tie his or her shoes at three years of age, does that mean that they should? If children can dress themselves independently with Velcro shoes, why frustrate them (and yourself) by insisting that they learn to tie bows?


A little girl is sitting at a table playing with ribbons

Independence is certainly very important, but independence is not all that bow tying has to offer the young child.


Consider what happens when a young child sits down to tie his shoes. According to my Montessori albums, there are twenty-six distinct steps to tying a bow. So many steps to remember! So many movements to perfect! So many chances for something to go wrong (Why does my bow have only one loop? Three loops?). So many opportunities to learn from past mistakes! A child tying a bow has to concentrate deeply, remember and follow a logical sequence of steps, and perform precise fine-motor tasks. As Montessorians, we know that it is exactly this sort of purposeful partnering between the hands and the mind that builds the brain and prepares the child for later academic challenges.


When you look at it this way, Velcro and slip-on shoes simply can't offer the child the same kind of experience.



Of course, I know that waiting for a child to struggle through the act of tying shoes can be exasperating, especially in the beginning. For those of you with “emergent shoe-tyers” at home, here are some tips to help your child succeed:


A woman is helping two little girls put on their shoes.
  1. Select shoes with a well-structured upper that are easy for your child to take on and off. I’ve had good luck with the thick-yet-flexible canvas uppers on shoes from companies like Keds and Superga. In the beginning, avoid Converse-style shoes with floppy uppers that collapse when the child attempts to put them on. Children also tend to accidentally over-tighten the laces on floppy shoes when they are off the feet, making it nearly impossible for the child to independently put them back on.

  2. Replace slippery round laces with flat laces. Round laces show up frequently on athletic shoes, and they simply will not stay tied. You can find flat replacement laces in 27 and 36 inch lengths online and in the shoe department at Target.

  3. Check the length of your child’s shoelaces. Generally speaking, the loops on the finished bows should be nicely and proportionately sized, and the ends of the laces should stop an inch or so above the ground. In the beginning, it is better to err on the side of "too long."

  4. If you have to replace your child’s laces, there is a good chance that the replacement laces will need to be cut to size. There are several different methods you can use to replace the aglets and keep the cut ends from fraying. (Ian’s Shoelace Site has an entire page dedicated to aglet repair. If you are interested, the site also boasts well-written instructions and diagrams for lacing shoes and tying bows in more ways than you ever thought possible!)

  5. Give your child lots of time to practice, every day, with the same pair of shoes. Children need lots of repetition to master shoe tying and move the skill into muscle memory. Once your child has tied their first successful bow, make an effort to ensure that he/she wears the same pair of tie shoes on every reasonable occasion until they can tie their shoes with ease. For a few weeks, you might find that you need an abundance of patience and some extra time in your schedule while your child practices putting on and tying these shoes.


In the end, the look on your child’s face will make it all worthwhile!


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=orspfZ_0U_4&feature=youtu.be&rel=0


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Forest Bluff School graduates perform a song onstage at their high school talent show.

Montessori Graduates Shine in High School Talent Show

By Margaret J. Kelley • May 19, 2025
I attended the Lake Forest High School Talent Show for the first time in February (2025). I’d been interested in it for years—watching talented young people with the courage to perform before a crowd is one of my favorite things to do. But it wasn’t until this year, when a friend with a child in the talent show actually procured tickets for me that I finally got around to going. The show runs three nights in a row, and we attended the second night. I brought my own ten-year-old daughter who has a special interest in singing and performing with me. As we settled into our seats and watched the show begin to unfold, I was struck by three things, in quick succession. First was the positive, welcoming community that made up Lake Forest High School (LFHS). There were cheerful parents working the concession stand and selling raffle tickets. There were enthusiastic teenagers, gathering in groups and excitedly finding their seats. Second was the immense array of talent already apparent just a few acts in—The MC’s who entertained the audience with skits and banter between performances, the pit band who played a variety of songs during downtime, the entertaining short videos that interspersed the live performances, and, of course, the extraordinary talent of the participants themselves. We saw various bands, a pianist (“And hockey player!”, more than one person pointed out to me) whose fingers flew over the keys, two girls who tap danced across the stage to Hamilton, a young woman who belted out an opera song that almost took the roof off the school, and many other incredible feats of talent and courage. Third, and most personal for me, were the Montessori alumni I saw that night. They were scattered throughout the crowd, supporting their peers. I saw the dark french braid of a sophomore who I’d known in the Young Children’s Community at Forest Bluff School. I noticed the wide smile of one of the most cheerful Primary students I’d ever known, and I overheard the happy laughter of a confident sophomore who’d graduated from eighth grade and was now surrounded by new friends. But the Montessori alumni who struck me the most that night were the Forest Bluff graduates I saw on the stage, participating in the talent show itself. There were three young women—a sophomore assisting with the live production, a junior who performed as a drummer in two acts and the pit band, and a senior who performed in several acts and served as the stage director for the entire production. These students are all markedly different in their temperaments and talents, and were supporting the show in vastly different ways, but they were all integral to the performance. They were all contributing to the experience for hundreds of students, parents, and community members, sharing their work ethic, skills, and inborn strengths. Two questions began to form as I watched them work together to create this two and a half hour feat—How did Montessori play a part in what these students were able to do tonight? And—How was Montessori able to serve these different young women in ways that allowed them to find their roles in the same shared experience? Fortunately for me (and for you!)I know all three girls personally. I reached out to them individually and asked them if (in exchange for a coffee or tea of their choice) they’d be willing to sit down with me to tell me more about what they did for the show, what the experience was like for them, and what role Montessori had played in preparing them for this work. They all responded quickly and cheerfully—happy to discuss their experiences with the LFHS talent show and their Montessori education. 
Two adolescents canoe down a river with trees in the background

Montessori Adolescent Program FAQs

By Abbey Dickson & John Dickson • April 23, 2025
At Forest Bluff School, the Secondary Level is a two-year program for adolescents, in which they continue their self-formation through more rigorous academic study as well experiential learning that includes service and wilderness trips. The Secondary Level has all the hallmarks of a Montessori adolescent program, with a focus on independence, responsibility, self-directed learning, community and collaboration, and practical life skills.